| All The Sheep Jokes |
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Sheep Joke - 23 added by Ness
Blondes and Sheep
Every jokes page has to have a blonde joke, so here goes
Sheep
There was a typical blonde. She had long, blonde hair, blue eyes, and she was sick of all the blond jokes.
One day, she decided to get a make-over, so she cut and dyed her hair. She also went out and bought a new convertible. She went driving down a country road and came across a herd of sheep. She stopped and called the sheep herder over.
'That's a nice flock of sheep.' She said.
'Well thank you.' Said the herder.
'Tell you what. I have a proposition for you.' said the woman.
'Okay.' Replied the herder.
'If I can guess the exact number of sheep in your flock, can I take one home?' Asked the woman.
'Sure.' Said the sheep herder.
So, the girl sat up and looked at the herd for a second and then replied '382'.
'Wow.' Said the herder. 'That is exactly right. Go ahead and pick out the sheep you want to take home.'
So the woman went and picked one out and put it in her car. Then, the herder said 'Okay, now I have a proposition for you'.
'What is it?' Queried the woman.
'If I can guess the real color of your hair, can I have my dog back?'
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Sheep Joke - 40 added by CountryGirl, Since 1992
Once there was a blonde who was tired of hearing blonde jokes, so she died her hair brown.
A few days later she was driving in the countryside and stopped to let a flock of sheep pass. Admiring the cute wooly creatures, she said to the shephard "if I can guess how many sheep you have, can I take one?" The shephard, always being a gentleman, said "Sure!"
The blonde thought for a minute and for no discernable reason said "352." This being the correct answer, the shephard was amazed, and exclaimed, "You're right! OK I'll keep my end of the bargain. Take your pick of my flock."
The blonde considered the flock and finally picked one that was by far cuter and more playful than any of the others.
When she was done, the shephard turned to her and said, "OK, I have a proposition for you. If I can guess your true hair color, can I have my dog back?"
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Sheep Joke - 64 added by Awesome Person
A shepherd was looking after his sheep on the side
of a deserted road. Suddenly a brand new Porsche
screeches to a halt. The driver, a young man
dressed in an Armani suit, Ray Bans, Tag Heuer
watch, White Cerutti shoes, tailor-made mauve
shirt, with a Boss tie.
He gets out and asks the shepherd 'If I can guess
how many sheep you have, can I keep one?'
The shepherd looks at the large flock of sheep and
says 'Okay'.
The young man connects his laptop to his mobile
phone/fax, enters the NASA website, scans the
field using his GPS, opens the database linked to
60 Excel tables, filled with logarithms and pivot
tables, then prints out a 150 page report on his
high tech mini printer. He studies the reports and
says to the shepherd 'You have 1586 sheep'.
The shepherd replies, 'That's correct. You can
have the pick of my flock.'
The young man packs away his equipment, looks at
the flock and puts one into the boot of the
Porsche.
As he is about to leave, the Shepherd says, 'If I
can guess what your profession is will you return
the animal to me?'
The young man thinks for a minute and says 'Okay'.
The shepherd says 'You are a Management
Consultant'.
The young man says 'Correct, how did you know?'
The Shepherd replied, 'Simple. First you came here
without being invited. Second you charge me a fee
for something I already knew. Third, you don't
understand anything about my business. - Now, can
I have my dog back?'
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